As we close out July and my first month of blogging, I wanted to take a minute to write you a thank you note. I'm really bad at writing real thank you notes, but it has meant so much to me to be able to share this piece of my life with you.
Thank you for reading.
I pray that you are inspired to take some steps towards healing as we walk this journey out of the fog together. I hope it helps to know you are not alone. I pray that God will continue to lead me in what to share and that He will touch your life.
I also want to say thank you to Chad. Without your endless love and support there is no way I would be able to do the things I do, including write. Thank you for being there for me, being patient with me and being real with me always. I love you so much and am a blessed woman to have you as my husband.
Love,
Bekah :)
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
Rest – Required
Last night I took a nice hot bath, soothed my aching muscles
with the heat after a busy weekend getting ready for the first day of school. It’s something I don’t do very often.
(I forget why?) I threw in some lovely aroma therapy oils, kept the room dark and just relaxed. That is until a happy little 2 year old skipped into my room and decided to hop in with me (oh yeah, that’s why). Not so relaxing when you end up with grapes floating around in the water and get splashed in the face. I wouldn’t have changed a thing though, I know these moments will soon be memories.
(I forget why?) I threw in some lovely aroma therapy oils, kept the room dark and just relaxed. That is until a happy little 2 year old skipped into my room and decided to hop in with me (oh yeah, that’s why). Not so relaxing when you end up with grapes floating around in the water and get splashed in the face. I wouldn’t have changed a thing though, I know these moments will soon be memories.
I must admit, I have always had to take extra rest, even
before I developed fibro. I’m an
introvert and it always has made me very tired to go out and do anything,
including being with other people (yes even people I love). I need to have some peace and quiet and alone
time to feel restored. Having this
syndrome has made me much more aware of this and from what I hear from others,
it is necessary for us to recuperate after even simple everyday activities like grocery
shopping or going to a lunch meeting. Problems arise when we don’t take this time
to rest. Pain, more fatigue and brain
fog are quick to creep up on us when we push too far. The longer the activity, or more energy exerted,
the more rest we need.
There are different types of rest described for us in the Scriptures.
Sabbath rest
Future rest in God
Rest/peace for the soul
We as humans need them all! But I’d like to focus on a few verses that
speak about rest/peace for our souls.
These are the verses we can cling to when we know we need rest and can
be encouraged that God will provide it for us!
Jesus speaks right to us in Matthew, “Come to me, all you
who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and
learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for
your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29.
He promises rest and peace from anxiety, “Do not be anxious
about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
present your requests to God. And the
peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and
your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7.
Sometimes we don’t even know we need rest and God provides
opportunities for us. (Oh how He loves
us!) “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall
not be in want. He makes me lie down in
green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.”
Psalm
23:1-3.
I love love love Psalm 23 and
encourage you to read and study the entire Psalm and find your rest in God
today!
“Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from
him.”
Psalm 62:5
Friday, July 27, 2012
Photo Friday!
I decided to share some of my photography with you all each Friday, and encourage you with God's beautiful Creation and His Word. Something you can meditate on over the weekend. You are welcome to download and use this photo with my watermark. Share it on Facebook, Pinterest, or use it as a screensaver. (photos are not to be sold, or used for advertising, please link back to my shop when using photos online) If you would like to purchase a print without the watermark, visit my shop on Etsy. Discount prices for Friday Photos!
Have a wonderful weekend!
Labels:
Bible,
Corinthians,
encouragement,
Fibromyalgia,
fms,
God,
healing,
health,
help,
orange,
Paul,
poppy,
suffering,
weak,
weakness
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Running – It’s What I Love
I quit running back in September 2011 because of the
horrible pain I was experiencing at the time.
This was before I went to see my Dr. and learned I have
fibromyalgia. I was never a great
runner, but I loved it. I had only
started a few years before and worked my way up to running a few 5K races with
an ultimate goal of doing a ½ marathon someday.
The Tinkerbell ½ Marathon at Disneyland to be exact. A lot of my pain in the beginning was joint
pain, in my feet, knees and hips. I was
stiff in the mornings and so very sore in the evenings I could barely
walk. When I did see my Dr. in November,
he confirmed that I should not be running.
Walking instead would be best.
But when I went to see a Rheumatologist for a 2nd opinion she
suggested that I continue to do what I loved, just start slow, build up very
slow, pace myself, and listen to my body so I don’t overdo it. It turned out a lot of my foot/leg pain was
Plantar Fasciitis, and I was able to get that under control by learning some stretches and wearing good
supportive shoes all the time (very hard for this flip-flop or barefoot girl! Thanks to my sister-in-law who also deals
with this, I was able to find some pretty cute supportive flip-flops by Orthaheel) It took me a few months to
try running again. I wanted to focus on
healing my body a bit.
When I first began running I followed the Couch 2 5K Running Plan from coolrunning. It is
a very mild approach of walking/running and building up slowly to avoid injury
over 9 weeks. I loved the program, so I
figured I would try it again. It turned
out that trying to run 3 days a week was too much, so I dropped it down to 2. I have learned a lot about energy management,
and for me, this is what I can handle. I
also believe the supplements I have been taking have helped with my energy and
opened up more of my day to be able to exercise. I have to run on days when I don’t have
anything else going on, to give myself plenty of time to rest and recover. Sometimes I have overdone it and suffered for
a couple of days after with pain and fatigue.
This was one thing that was worth it to me to try and get
back from my life before fibro. I missed
the quiet prayer time with just me and God (and usually my little one ridding
in the stroller). Getting out in nature
(well, suburban nature) and feeling the sun on my skin. It’s always been a great stress reliever for
me, and given me a goal to work towards.
So once again I have set that goal of running the Tinkerbell ½ marathon
someday. Currently I am on week 7 of the C25K
program although I have been running for 10 weeks now. I feel great over all. It has helped with energy, motivation, stress
relief and more!
I want to point out that I am NOT telling you to go out and run. This may not be right for you. I also understand that I may not be able to do this forever. You should seek advice from your Dr. about what type of exercise is best for you. Start slow and build up slowly. The normal recommendations for people with fibro are
low impact; walking, yoga and aqua therapy. Even with those
you must build up slowly.
It takes time!
What do you do for exercise?
Labels:
1/2 marathon,
5K,
C25K,
couch 2 5K,
energy,
exercise,
Fibromyalgia,
fms,
footsmart,
health,
healthy,
marathon,
orthaheel,
pain,
run,
running,
stress,
supplements,
walking
Monday, July 23, 2012
Priorities - Where Does Fibromyalgia Fit?
It sure takes a lot of time and effort to revamp your
life. Lots of reading, studying,
testing and practicing. I feel sometimes
like this is a new job. I guess it
is. I have spent hours and hours reading,
and talking with others who are living with fibromyalgia, trying to find what
God leads me to put into practice in my own life as steps towards healing. This can quickly take over your whole
life, putting God and family
responsibilities on the back-burner! I
KNOW that is not what God wants for me, so where does getting healthy fit into
my priorities?
Here is an illustration
that shows the Circles of Priority for a Christian Adult according to
Bearing Fruit in God's Family by NavPress:
Bearing Fruit in God's Family by NavPress:
After talking about this with my husband we came up with the
idea that for me, fibro should fall between “Work” (I should point out that "Work" does not necessarily mean a paying job) and “Other." We’ll call it “Self/Health,” not “selfishness,”
but “Self/Health.” This is the place to
work on getting healthy. My list for “Self/Health”
would include;
-reading/research on my illness
-healthy eating
-supplements
-exercise (which for me includes lots of prayer time & scripture meditation)
-Dr. appointments
-resting (which could lead back to God)
-blogging
(which could also be helping others)
Maybe you would add massage, chiropractor
or acupuncture. Whatever you do that
surrounds your illness and healing. All
of these are important and have a place on our priority list. Here is my new visual which you can grab, print & customize with your own priorities:
Certainly there are times in people’s lives where health
needs to be moved up on the list. If you
are hospitalized, or going through something like Cancer, your priorities may
look different for a season. When your
illness has you so down (physically or emotionally) that you can no longer do
the things on your priority list, that is a problem that needs to be addressed. You should seek help to get things under control.
As I spoke about in a previous post, Job - Help for the Hurting, God allows things to
happen in our lives for the purpose of bringing us closer to Him. Don’t let anything get in the way of that relationship!
My point is this. Let’s not let fibromyalgia (or whatever illness you have) take over our
lives to the point where we are ineffective Christians.
Let’s put it in its place.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
New Habit – Supplements
I hate pills. Always
have. I’m not one to take them unless it’s
absolutely necessary. Just the idea
usually turns my weak stomach. Let’s
face it though; we are not getting the nutrients we need from our food. People with fibromyalgia are often deficient in
certain vitamins and minerals, and may need some help getting our bodies back
to the right levels. It IS necessary. My Dr. recommended a
few for me, and like I mentioned in a previous post, Figuring out Fibromyalgia,
one of the things suggested was to take a few supplements. So I decided to give it a try and see if it
made any difference for me.
I began to do a little research on the supplements I should
be taking and quickly became overwhelmed.
There are so many to choose from, so many different brands, dosages,
different kind of pills, powders & drinks.
I had to walk away from the computer in frustration many times. I had no idea what the best way to take each one was, the best time of day. BLAH. Then one day I was out shopping at Costco
& just decided to go get what I needed there, give it a try and then change later if I
needed to. I stood there in the isle
with a very unhappy 2 year old in the cart (he hates shopping) and read through
the supplement chapter of Figuring out Fibromyalgia on my Kindle.
3. Vitamin D3
Got it! Now I was committed. Those Costco size supplements are no joke. It was around $50 for all 3. I'm getting close to running out of the Triple Omega now, but the other 2, I still have plenty! And it's been months since I bought them. Little tip, keep them in your fridge! (They keep longer & no fish smell from the omega)
I devoted myself to taking them
every day. And for the most part I
have! I forget some mornings, and there
was a month that I stopped as a little test to see if they really were helping,
and about a week when I was pretty sick.
Other than that, I have been faithful since January 2012.
Another thing I wanted to try was herbs. My sister is studying to be an
herbalist. She took some time and
knowing what was going on with me, made up a few different things to help.
For me, just doing this small thing with just these few
supplements & herbs has made a HUGE difference in my life. It took about 2 weeks to really kick in. Taking the Omega Blend has helped tremendously
with my brain fog. I would say I have
about an 80% improvement. The B complex
has given me a little bit of my life back.
Instead of heading downhill at around 4pm every day, I’m usually just
fine until bed time. Having more energy
is such a blessing. I would rate it at
about 50% improvement (and getting better).
I don’t feel any difference with or without the Vitamin D3, but from
what I’ve read, this is worth taking.
And it’s just a little easy pill. The herbs
that I take have helped me with a few other health issues, not necessarily
related to fibro. The more I read &
learn, there are probably some more supplements that would be helpful for
me. I have just started taking MagnesiumGlycinate. I’ll let you know how it goes!
I urge you to talk with your Dr., get some testing done to
see if there are deficiencies, and do a little reading for yourself. It is worth it! I am VERY pleased with my
experience & will continue to take my pills every day. Hey, it forces me to eat a little breakfast
every morning so I can stomach taking the pills. There’s another good
habit.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Job - Help for the Hurting
“so I have been allotted months of futility,
and nights of
misery have been assigned to me.
When I lie down I think, ‘How long before I get up?’
The night drags
on, and I toss and turn until dawn.” Job
7:3-4
“And now my life ebbs away;
days of suffering
grip me.
Night pierces my bones;
my gnawing pains
never rest.” Job 30:16-17
Sound familiar?
Researching the history of fibromyalgia you will often find references
to Job possibly being the first recorded sufferer. I hadn’t heard anything about this before I
began investigating this syndrome, and I have studied the book of Job a few
times.
Most commentators agree that Job is the oldest book in the
Bible, possibly written soon after the flood of Noah, many years before Moses
penned the Torah (first 5 books of the Bible).
Job was a righteous and wealthy man.
Satan approached God with a challenge, that when all good things were
taken away from him, Job would blame God and turn from Him. Satan is given approval to prove his theory
and all of Job’s wealth is taken away, his ten adult children are killed and he
is afflicted with illness. Why does God
allow us to suffer? Three of Job’s
friends show up to try and make sense of what was happening to this Godly man. Job never wavers in his faith and worship of
God. Then, the Creator and Sustainer of
the universe speaks to Job about who He is.
A Living, Loving, Personal God, active in all facets of His
creation. Job is found to have passed
this test and God blesses him, giving him twice as much as he had before. More wealth, more children, and although the
text doesn’t mention his health, the fact that people once again were not
afraid to be around him, and the fact that he lived happily for 140 years after these events, leads me to believe he was healed.
As I read more of Job’s own description of his afflictions
and looked back to the beginning of the story, “So Satan went out from the presence of the
Lord and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the
crown of his head.” Job 2:7, I can’t
help but doubt that fibromyalgia is what was ailing him. In my opinion whatever it was, was horrible
and included open sores (boils) that would explain his physical torture. However, even if Job didn’t suffer from
fibromyalgia, those of us that live with pain can turn to this book for
comfort, answers and hope.
“There is great news to those who have lost possessions, for
those who have lost position and for those who have lost health. God is near, God is in Love with you and God
is in control. It is a huge challenge,
but the truth is that the God who directs each and every lightning bolt is in
control of the situation. Nothing that
has happened in a life, as tragic as it is, is a surprise to God, nor was it
beyond His capability to stop it. The
good news is that God is so capable that He can not only manage, but also
direct the life of each individual in such a way that measured in the eternal
scheme of things, a perfect plan unfolds that is best for the person and brings
glory to God. The life of the hurting is
in the powerful and loving hand of the Creator and has His laser focus and
undivided attention.” (193-194) God’s Science Quiz, Dr. Gary Sutliff.
I invite you to study The Book of Job for yourself and pray that
you find comfort in it as I have.
For
further study into the science in Job, you can pick up my Dad’s book on the
subject!
Labels:
Bible,
depression,
fatigue,
Fibromyalgia,
fibromyalgia symptoms,
fms,
healing,
help,
hope,
hurting,
Job,
pain,
prayer,
sick,
sleep,
stress,
suffering
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Stormy days – Am I a Human Barometer?
Something I have read about, and heard from others, is that
weather really affects their fibromyalgia.
Up until recently I’ve been pretty confused about my symptoms and what
is going on with me, but it seemed like the weather really didn’t bother me
much. I live in AZ where it is very dry
most of the year. But every summer,
mid-July, we get hit with monsoons. The
humidity literally goes from 0 – 60 in a matter of days. It’s lovely to have summer storms in the
desert. Pouring rain, lighting shows and
the most beautiful sunsets you’ve ever seen!
I’ve been feeling pretty good lately. Tired, yes, but not in all that much pain and
my brain has been working pretty well. :) This morning though, I woke up with a fuzzy
head and was sore from head to toe. I tried to help my
husband make some breakfast, but kept forgetting what I was doing, why I had
opened the fridge, stuff like that. I
just did not feel right. Went about the
day and we even took the kids to the movies.
While we were there the sky opened up and it poured like it hasn’t all
summer! We’ve had a few good storms, but
this one was the biggest. Rain, wind,
hail, thunder, lighting! We were ducking
in and out of stores at our outdoor mall while this was going on. My hero of a husband braved the storm and
went to get our big suburban “Bruce” as close to us as possible. We all got soaked despite his efforts.
It was quite an adventure.
It was quite an adventure.
Once we got home and I sat down to rest (more like crash) I
realized that my body had been trying to tell me this morning that it would
storm today. I think I am more in tune
to my own body and symptoms now that I have been paying attention to and
trying to improve them. Here is an article from fibromyalgia-symptoms.org on Weather and Fibromyalgia, that explains why the weather effects us!
I really am a human barometer!
Next time, I will listen.
I really am a human barometer!
Next time, I will listen.
Labels:
fatigue,
Fibromyalgia,
fibromyalgia symptoms,
fms,
pain,
sick,
stress
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Good Read – Educate Me!
I love to read and I’m really picky about what I spend my
time on. I don’t trust just anything, so
it was hard for me to choose my first book about fibromyalgia. I searched, asked in groups, read reviews, and
settled on Figuring out Fibromyalgia by Ginevra Liptan M.D.
I bought it on my Kindle from Amazon for $9.99 so I could start reading
right away & was very happy with my choice.
Dr. Liptan developed fibromyalgia herself while she was in medical
school and has spent her time in practice with fibro patients.
She is the Medical Director of “The Frida Center” in Oregon, where they treat and educate about fibromyalgia. So I felt like I could believe her.
I like that the book has very current information, published
in April 2011. I also appreciate how
fibro is explained. I really had no
knowledge as to what was happening to my body and this book helped educate me
to where I can now even explain it to others.
It made perfect sense! Not only
does Dr. Liptan explain the syndrome, but she talks about causes, and then
treatment. The treatments suggested aren’t
just “take this prescription”, but really talk about healing your body. Just what I was hoping for! Direction!
The 5 main treatments recommended are:
diet
exercise
sleep
manual therapy (myofascial
massage)
reducing the “fight or flight response” (stress)
She also reviews treatments such as supplements
and prescriptions, and includes a chapter on alternative treatments that may or
may not be worth your time/money (cleansing & detoxifying, acupuncture,
magnets, microcurrent therapy, cold laser therapy, bodywork, vitamins,
minerals, supplements, hormones, etc.).
I haven’t taken all of the advice, some things are expensive
and seemed out of reach (like specific food allergy blood testing), but for me
it was a place to start. I know that God
is leading me to become a healthier person and treat my body better. "Let us cleanse ourselves from everything that can defile our body or spirit. And let us work toward complete holiness because we fear God." 2 Corinthians 7:1 NLT. This book is a great guide. I started by deciding to focus on the 5 main
treatments and add the few supplements she suggested. I dedicated a week for each one and read
and studied and practiced. I’m not
there yet, after 6 months I’m still working at it (diet has been tricky and to be honest I haven't done anything with Myofascial massage), but I can tell you I have
had a GREAT improvement in my symptoms.
I have gone from living every day in pain and in a fog, to having good
days and bad days and have a greater understanding of what is going on inside.
Get it.
Read it.
Do it!
Saturday, July 7, 2012
First Steps to Healing!
I am a follower of Christ.
I believe the Bible is the Word of God and I try to live my life to
reflect that. So when faced with having
fibromyalgia I naturally turned to prayer for help. I would pray (and still do) for healing and guidance on
how to handle living with this syndrome.
I wrestled with what I was being told by Dr.’s to be selfish and the
negativity I was seeing in other people around the world living with
fibro. I wrestled for months, “HOW do I
handle this God?” All kinds of people of
course were there to offer suggestions.
Most wanting to be helpful. Try
this diet, take this pill, read this book.
For me though, I need to hear it from God. The answers need to come from His Word. The first place I was led to was the book of
James. I was doing a Bible study with
the women’s ministry at my church. I
loved it, even though I was late most meetings. (It was held in the mornings & I am just
NOT a morning person.) James is a short
book, 5 chapters. Guidance came for me
in Chapter 5. Yup, He made me wait a
little bit.
Well. That’s pretty
clear. I was sick. I needed to call up the elders of my church
and have them pray over me. So I did. Next week in church I wrote my request on a
little card & turned it in. Was
contacted & set up a time for me to come to a board meeting. (I would also like to mention that I shared
this in my Bible study group and those wonderful ladies gathered around me
right then to pray. We all can and
should pray for one another with the authority of Christ. “Therefore confess your sins to each other
and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous
man is powerful and effective.” James 5:16)
My husband came with me that evening, and the board members gathered around me, laid hands on me and took turns praying for healing. I cried the whole time. I wasn’t sure what to expect. I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to receive complete healing right then. I do believe that that is possible! But I believe God has me on a PATH to healing and this was my first step of faith & obedience. I left feeling very blessed to be surrounded by people who care, and earnestly prayed for me to heal. Thank you Mission Community Church! I also left that evening knowing that healing is coming.
My husband came with me that evening, and the board members gathered around me, laid hands on me and took turns praying for healing. I cried the whole time. I wasn’t sure what to expect. I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to receive complete healing right then. I do believe that that is possible! But I believe God has me on a PATH to healing and this was my first step of faith & obedience. I left feeling very blessed to be surrounded by people who care, and earnestly prayed for me to heal. Thank you Mission Community Church! I also left that evening knowing that healing is coming.
Symptoms - What's My Problem?
One of the first things I did when my Dr. suggested that
I had fibromyalgia was to read.
(Really we all need to stay away from webmd don’t we, but it’s where I
started.) Other than a few commercials,
and being familiar with a couple of people that lived with it, I didn’t know
much. From what I knew at the time, it
didn’t sound like what I had. Muscle
pain was what kept coming up, and I didn’t THINK I had much muscle pain. Aches and pains sure, but not the excruciating
muscle pain that I had heard about. The
pain that was bothering me the most was joint pain in my legs, feet, knees and
hips. I found a list of symptoms and I
couldn’t believe how much fit me! Things
I hadn’t even thought about as a problem, or things that didn’t seem to fit
together, became clearer.
Common symptoms of fibromyalgia -- also known as fibromyalgia syndrome or FMS -- may include:
Anxiety - oh yes
Just seeing lists like this helped me. I wasn’t crazy, this was actually happening to me! Then came the next step. What do I do about it?
Common symptoms of fibromyalgia -- also known as fibromyalgia syndrome or FMS -- may include:
Pain - yup
Anxiety - oh yes
Concentration and memory problems -- known as "fibro
fog" – the worst!
Depression - yes
Fatigue – oh so much
Headaches - sometimes
Irritable bowel syndrome - maybe
Morning stiffness – oh yes!
Painful menstrual cramps – getting worse by the month
Sleep problems - yes
Numbness, and tingling in hands, arms, feet, and legs - yes
Tender points – ouch!
Urinary symptoms, such as pain or frequency – no
After reading that I was sure the Dr. was right. THIS is what my problem was. There are more extensive lists out there
which only confirmed for me what was going on.
Just seeing lists like this helped me. I wasn’t crazy, this was actually happening to me! Then came the next step. What do I do about it?
Introduction - Living in a Fog
We all have difficult things that we face in our lives. Broken relationships, illness, death,
poverty. I have not had to walk a very
hard path most of my life, but I have had struggles. I have faced tough times and been brought
through a few fires. I have relied on my
God to bring me through these things.
His grace is unmatched. I would
love to share my story with you and give a voice to what daily life is like
living with fibromyalgia and fighting it!
My journey with fibromyalgia began in November of 2011. After living with severe pain in my legs
& feet for over a year, getting worse as time went on, my husband convinced
me to see a Dr. and figure out what could be wrong. I was tired all the time and felt like I was
living in a fog. Whatever was going on
was really interfering with my life & my ability to be a parent & keeper
of my home.
At the time, I was 33 and stay at home mom of a 13, 10 and 2
year old. Every day I would wake up and
feel like I’d been hit by a truck.
Everything hurt. I felt swollen
and achy from my feet to my fingertips, up to my neck, jaw and top it off with a
headache some days. My joints were the
worst. I could tell what kind of day it
was going to be by how much it hurt to walk down the stairs. On the bad days I felt like my bones would
snap as I took one step at a time gripping the railing for dear life. I would get kids off to school and then sit
on the couch and try to wake up for around 2 hours, or go back to bed for a few
hours depending on how late my 2 year old would sleep. Once I actually felt awake around lunch time,
I could usually get ONE thing done during the day. One errand, clean One area of the house, One
playdate. It wasn’t good if I tried to
do more. I often pushed myself
though. Just get one more thing done, or
run in the store really quick. That
always led straight to a crash. I was
always forgetting meetings, or phone calls to make, appointments, or some other
household tasks, or cancelling plans because I just couldn’t leave the house. I tried to play and engage with my 2 year
old, but more often than not, I couldn’t do much. I couldn’t even take him to the park. Just the thought of that made me tired.
For me, when I say I feel “tired” that usually means that my
entire body is SCREAMING at me to “Stop Stop Stop!!! Sit down!
Rest! You can’t go on!” It’s an all-consuming feeling of being
overwhelmed and exhausted. My mind would
fog over & I was done. Out.
I don’t know how I made it through dinner time most
days. Usually around 4pm I would start
to head downhill. Just in time for the
older kids to come home and need help with homework (that I couldn’t do because
I couldn’t even think) or be driven to some activity. The pain in my legs was
more than I could bear by that time of day.
My husband would come home from work and watch me as I literally cried just
standing up & walking some nights.
Forget cleaning up dinner. I
would park myself on the couch after eating and there I would stay until bed time
where I would become so stiff and sore it hurt to move. I was exhausted, yet I would dread going to
sleep because I knew how bad I was going to feel when I woke up.
This is how I lived for a year. Feeling like a failure at life. Ineffective for ministry. Wondering if this was just “getting
older.” I was ready for answers. I was ready to have my life back. I had hope.
I know that God can heal. I
myself have experienced a miracle in emotional healing. I just didn’t know how long my journey with
this would be. Would you like to walk
out of the fog with me?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)